Revision of Narratives
Consider the following as you revise your narratives. Look at the two sample narratives for examples. Have your partner help you to identify these elements in your own narrative and consider how you may improve them.
- Presence and purpose of flashbacks, tangents, allusions
- Elements used to characterize
- Language - Is it consistent throughout? What, if any, slang terms have you used? Do you sound like Holden? If so, is it forced or appropriate? Do you have a clear voice and tone, and do your language choices help to establish these?
- Use of italics, dashes, sentence structure (varied short and long) - have you used them? If so, for what purpose?
- Dialogue - Is it used? If so, is it used effectively and written correctly?
- Realization - Is it cliche? How is it written? Does it stay in the same tone/voice of the rest of the piece? Do you lead up to it well?
- Beginning - Is it effective? Does it throw your reader right in? Does it establish your voice from the onset?Be sure to distinguish between long, rambling sentences and run-on sentences. Remember that two or more independent clauses cannot be joined with just a comma even in this type of assignment.
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